incorrigibles: (( 16 ))
charles rowland, bisexual disaster 🌈™ ([personal profile] incorrigibles) wrote in [personal profile] coolerjunpei 2024-09-29 04:24 pm (UTC)

Where else was I gonna put it, [ he answers with not nearly as much humour as there would be under different circumstances, and yet it's the most levity he's managed during this whole conversation so far. and really, it's not like he doesn't know it's not necessarily ideal, but he can't really carry one with him any other way, and he needs it — there's absolutely no way he's not going to come back the second he can, the very second their reset mission no longer needs him.

and then junpei's arms are around him again and he responds automatically in kind, holds him close and lets his head dip forward so he can rest it against his shoulder for a second or two, lets his eyes fall shut and thinks if i could i'd stay here just like this — except he can't, of course, which is the whole reason he's here. and yet, he's not entirely sure he has the strength to let go, especially not when junpei tells him to stay when he's back, and that —
]

As long as you want. [ he lifts his head as he says this, and perhaps in another situation, he'd make a quip about whether junpei is asking him to move in with him; but he can't joke, not now, and perhaps never about this, not when he thinks he's made it pretty clear there's nowhere else he'd rather be, ever, than with junpei.

but he can't — and with a final squeeze of his arms around junpei, he steps back and turns towards the mirror.
]

Right, [ he says, with a smile that doesn't quite reach his eyes, ] I guess... I'm off, then. [ and to his credit, he makes it as far as the mirror before he turns to look back, and god if the idea of leaving isn't like a physical ache; he takes a moment to simply look at junpei, because if this is the last time they see each other, then he wants to remember. and maybe there's another version of this where he turns back like he wants, where he crosses the distance between them and kisses junpei like he so badly wants to — but in this version of events, he simply stands in place, almost helplessly quiet for a moment. ] Junpei, I — [ he starts, and stops; his smile wavers just a bit. ]

... You be safe. [ and with that, he turns back to the mirror, its surface turning liquidy, his own form turning blue and translucent, and it just takes one step for him to be gone. ]

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